Which Candidate Can Prove The Most CHANGE?
Picture this: The six leading candidates in both parties getting together, pitching their spare change into one of those games where you use a crane controlled from outside the glass enclosure in order to get coins to drop out into a tray. It’s popular at many family restaurants in parts of the country. Dreamy isn’t it. Bipartisan agreement.
Amazingly they had agreed that each candidate would each have half an hour with the crane in order to push out as much change as possible and each candidate would keep the change which they recovered based on their own skill, and no help from aides or anyone else was allowed other than cheering, and an official count would be made in front of all with private cameras running. Senate rules would apply if needed. The counting was done by all and after several recounts candidates reluctantly agreed on the results. Everything was captured on film as they had youtube in mind.
The idea was for the candidate with the most change in each party, to be congratulated on TV in pure fun to demonstrate they could each find concensus, and despite the outcome, to each be leaders, get something done and for all to bask in the light of bilateral praise while recognizing the dexterity of the two winners, one from each party who demonstrated skill in collecting change. Change of course has become what this campaign is now all about and they all wanted to add some levity to the process and maybe create a funny Youtube Video together.
Everything went swimmingly until after the count was made and the winners and losers were known. Suddenly a dispute arose across and even within party lines with various allegation ranging from the charge that lobbyists were allowed to guide an arm here and there, to the fact that lobbyist played certain music that was pleasant to some but disturbing to others and that high tech optics and cameras were strategically moved by lobbyists for the benefit of some but not all.
Votes were eventually taken to try to find a way out of this potential public relations fiasco, but no matter which candidate proposed the terms of a solution, the vote was always deadlocked three to three. Panic was palpitating as new accusations increasingly popped out as the candidates argued with each other and at one point, three candidates who were in agreement were ready to hold a press conference. Finally the aides prevailed and forced agreement among themselves to quietly call in the Vice President to break the tie which is the way the Senate works. It was agreed that he would come over at night in an unmarked car.
This was a solution no one imagined would be needed and which they did not want to use because no one liked the Vice President and nor did they want him to have any opportunity under oath to inadvertently testify about their dirty laundry, but there really seemed no better way out and he promised not to blow their cover.
After Dick Cheney arrived in an unmarked car, he listened to the various proposals all of which were gridlocked and decided he did not like any of the solutions and refused to place a vote to break the tie for either side on any of the proposals. He evidently felt he could deny he was there on official business under the circumstances and the candidates and aides were besides themselves as they did not feel like admitting to the press that they had called the VP out in secrecy to help them reach a majority.
Moral of the story is……..look down
Further down…..
A little further……
Keep going…
There is no change on the way. No matter what games they play.
Except maybe if the Chief Hypocrite is drafted in a universal movement by all political parties wanting him to represent them all. Hold your breathe.
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